By
Sister Initiate Heng-Jing Chiu, Taoyuan, Formosa
Full
of ideals and vigor, I participated in the reclamation saga of Raising Center
in Cambodia. In the beginning a proud attitude of knowing how to work well brought
me a series of obstacles and troubles. My sense of confidence was gradually
replaced by a sense of defeat. I became clumsy in my work. Not only that, I
could not even catch up with the tempo of the group -- I was causing troubles!
The sense of failure that followed made me very upset. I was blaming myself
shamelessly because of the fear of losing face in doing the wrong thing. After
struggling for sometime, I could not bear it anymore. I cried to the inner Master,
repented, and asked for guidance to let me to have the courage to face myself,
to let me have the chance to correct myself so that I could grow quickly.
Early the next morning, I
was sent to another group. I happily participated in the work of cleaning the
environment. One of the jobs was to burn and bury the parched 'bamboo barbs'
that remained after clearing the land. Initially, I thought that the burning
and burying of garbage was an easy job. It was in doing the work that I realized
that it took a lot of know-how. The burning of the 'bamboo barbs' was especially
troublesome! The sharp and hard barbs would tangle with one another and one
would easily get hurt if one was not careful enough. When I was having some
resentment in the heart and complaining in the mind, a barb pierced through
my rubber boot and penetrated the sole of my foot. The pain woke me up from
my dream. Seeing the bamboo in the fire, tears rushed from my eyes. I was thinking,
shamefully, that the pride and strong disposition in me was just like one of
those 'bamboo barbs', that had hurt other people for a long time! When one was
hurt, it was so painful! I silently prayed to Mummy-Master, wishing that all
the 'barbs' accumulated through many lives could be burnt in the fire! May all
the visible and invisible barbs be burnt into ashes!
How could it be possible that
a person with 'barbs' could work with others? I must get rid of my pride and
prejudice first before my confidence could be built up again. It did not take
too long. After I opened up my heart to learn the lessons of humility and obedience,
I was sent back to the original group to work.
After working for days under
the hot sun, strong winds and rain, it was really a great comfort when I returned
to work inside. The work with woks and spatulas require great humility and obedience,
as water and fire have no compassion! God wanted me to learn how to control
myself well so that I could finish the cooking in time. I faced the whole new
challenge with the most happy heart. I had to learn through the lessons of humility
and obedience to understand the secrets in leadership, command and working at
different levels.
The road of practice is full
of learning opportunities. Master has graciously given us such a good environment
to let us try our best to correct and examine ourselves and to practice diligently.
I am so grateful! I prayed to the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas in the ten directions
in the three periods of time to bless us, hoping that our reclamation saga would
proceed smoothly and benefit sentient beings. In just a few months, the lessons
that I learnt have been so varied. Everyone's vibration has become very fast.
In order to catch up with the group's tempo, one has to thrust forward diligently.
The improvement was so quick that what I would learn in one year, or even in
a whole lifetime could not even compare to what I've learned in these few months.