By Sister Initiate Marina,
Costa Rica
My
personality and my temperament have always bothered me. Being frank
and outspoken have often caused me unintentionally to offend others.
Although I have continually tried to change, I had never succeeded.
Last
year, I fell into an unsatisfactory state and was overcome with feelings
of being wronged. I became depressed and felt that nothing was to my
liking. (Seeing that I had been stuck for too long, the inner Master
must have become worried about me.) One night, when I fell asleep in
a helpless and resentful mood, I dreamed that Master was distributing
blessed food to fellow initiates. The atmosphere was very loving. Master
waved Her hand and called me to get some food first, while other fellow
initiates were waiting aside. I took an apple and was about to walk
away; however, Master stopped me and told me to eat it right away. After
I had eaten only two bites, She took the apple from me and ate it. Seeing
that, I anxiously shouted, "Master, please don't eat it! I've already
eaten some of it" And I began trying to take it back from Her.
At that
time, I felt very hurt and disturbed as well as sorry to Master. How
could I let a living Buddha do such a thing? I suddenly realized that if Master being so venerable could humble Herself,
make such a great example for the benefit of others, why couldn't I
be soft and forgiving and not haggle over what I believed to be right
or wrong? Thank You, Master, for giving me guidance. I will be more
diligent in my spiritual practice and will not make trouble for You
anymore. 
Spiritual Interludes
