Dear Master:

When I was translating Your lecture last night, I read this sentence: "Unlock your heart, release your love!" Since childhood, many people have complained that I do not have any compassion. I never dared to tell other people that sometimes I really cannot love this world or anyone, because I cannot love myself.

There were several occasions when I was so touched in Your presence that I could not help but cry. I felt the infinite love of God from You that melted my entire being. Even those very cold, hard and sharp areas hidden deep in my heart, so deep that I did not even notice them myself, all melted just like ice under the sun.

In the bible, God said to Adam: By the sweat of your brow you shall eat bread, till you return to the ground. Obviously, this world was too distant from my ideal. Not knowing why, I really felt hurt. I did not know whether it was the world that rejected me or whether I was rejecting myself. I also did not know whether it was my environment that was harming me, or whether I was harming myself. I often felt that God and my real Self were close and yet so distant. It's only through Your love that I can love the people of this world.

For a long time, I could only accept the apparently strong and open part of myself. I could not possibly face the weak, hurt and sensitive self. In order to protect myself, I used layers of barriers to lock away a part of me in a well hidden corner. However, as long as I refused to accept all of me, I could never really love myself. I could never be a complete person and I could not love any other person. Although Master had already given me the Golden Key, as the master of the old castle, no one else could possibly open it until I agreed.

Last night, I faced the timid, frightened and weak child for the first time and embraced it. Now I know I can really start to love myself.

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