Many of us think that we know the precepts, we understand the precepts, and that we keep the precepts. But you must know that the precepts have three parts: physical, spiritual and mental. Most people are married and stay with a married partner for all life long, and they think they are faithful. But Jesus said that even if you look upon the neighbor's wife and have lust in your heart, you have already committed adultery. So make sure every precept we keep is even physically, astrally, intellectually all clean and pure. Of course, we can not help it if the habit rises up again. But we can help by stopping it, not following it, and making excuses for ourselves.
If you get married and you stay with one person for a long time and all the time, you think you are faithful; but be careful. Some people use marriage certificate as a shield in order to play to the limit. Sometimes flirt around with people and then people can't say anything because I'm married. So people think that just because you are married, you can kind of flirt around all the time without worrying; because if you don't like that person, say, "Sorry I'm married." If you like then you can flirt a lot more and then use marriage as a limit, so that you can enjoy it to some certain extent; but then no one can do anything, no one can say anything. After all you go back to your husband, or to your wife. But that's not true faithfulness either.
So if you truly want to be faithful to your wife or husband the precept is from inside out. You don't even look at another person. You don't even care what the other person wears or does. You don't care what he or she looks like. And you don't even have one idea of comparing your wife or husband to another persons', or to look for a kind of pleasure in any form apart from your own partner. That is true faithfulness. That is very difficult. But difficult doesn't mean impossible. I did that during my marriage. It was just natural. It was not because I knew the precept or anything like that. It was just natural. When I was married, I was married. I knew that, and finish. So if you yourself make your will become strong and guide your own mind and passion into one direction only, your life will become more peaceful, your marriage will become blissful and enjoyable.
If you don't guide yourself, you will always make excuses, like, "Oh I'm just holding hands. I'm just looking. I'm not doing anything. I haven't gone to bed with her yet." Need you do that in order to be unfaithful? There is astral sex as well, not physical only. I'm sorry to tell you all this so bluntly and not very nobly, but what else can I tell you? Sex is not ignoble, if you have love between each other and between the bond of marriage and responsibility, only if you do it with love, then you should have sex with your partner. If you don't feel love, this is just a machine function, it is abusing each other's physical beauty, and there's nothing there. You will feel very empty, you will begin to look around, and then you'll be in a worse situation.
When you're married or love a person, you should concentrate only there, and it will bring you some kind of bliss as well. It will add flavor to your practicing life and this is also one kind of practice. If you concentrate on one thing, if you concentrate on the love between each other it is also a kind of concentration, and it brings you happiness. Whatever brings you true happiness and pure happiness is also adding to your spiritual practice. Whatever strays from that is negative. So the precept is not that you keep it physically only, because there are thoughts, deeds and speech. Everything springs from the thought as well. So if you don't think, you will not do. If you don't think first, you can't speak.
Therefore you have to keep the precept from the thought already. Always guide your thought, carefully where it should go. Tell your thought that this is not possible to think that way, it's not proper, you should not even think about it; and slowly your mind will listen to your direction. That's how you master yourself. Not eager to become a master of the multitude and teach disciples and all that, but to master your own horses within, make then go where you want them to go. That's how your life becomes more powerful. You know yourself you are the master of your own destiny and direction. That's when you feel strong, powerful, confident; are able to look even God directly in the eyes and tell Hirm I have nothing to fear. (Applause)
If you give your life partner, beloved one or married person your true love and encouragement, day by day you will discover that person grows in different beauties and virtues. Then you will enjoy more and more that companionship, instead of diverting your attention to another direction, giving love to the wrong person. You are not supposed to love that person, or the neighbor's wife, giving all your virtues, attention and blessing to that person. Then you will see your partner more and more ugly everyday. You don't give her any blessing. You have no contact with each other. You have no supporting energy with each other. Of course, she will become less and less attractive, and further and further away from you.
I am telling you very bluntly that you must keep the precepts from inside your heart, not the physical. Physical is the least, and is the last thing. Sometime the physical precept was broken, but the true precept wasn't. It has happened too. Like you are forced to steal, or you are forced to do something, but act ually in your heart you are pure. That could be too, and that is excusable. That's why Jesus said: "Whoever steals for the family's bread, that person is not guilty." Now you understand. (Audience: Yes.)
We practice because we want to be free from worry. We want to be free from anxiety and all kinds of binding in this world. So if a true love between woman or wife could afford you also happiness and forever everyday like this, this also is a kind of bonus. So don't look down upon your partners, but respect them like Gods and Goddesses. And that's the only God and Goddesses to worship beside the Supreme Master Ching Hai Suma Tse. (Master laughs and audience applauds.)
In India when Shiva was alive, he taught one hundred and twenty extra kinds of practices for lay people. One of them included love between husband and wife. Like when you embrace each other you should just merge yourself in the embrace, become one with it, with the feeling. Then you'll be oblivious to all kinds of trouble, at least at that time. That's why in this life people are so attached to sex; because it affords them temporary bliss, and affords them ability to forget all the troubles, sorrows and worries for the moment. What the people of this world do not realize is that it's not sex alone that brings you lasting happiness. It is the love before, between and after that, that makes this pleasure gift from God meaningful, and a responsibility with each other to raise children into other Gods and Goddesses to walk on this earth. Altogether, all this, all the shared happiness, joy and responsibility makes the life of a husband and wife beautiful.
That's why the people who go out and seek all kinds of short time pleasure, they often end up in sorrow, empty; so they will not even respect women and do not know the real bliss of true love. Those people who have a lot of women or men, you ask them whether they're happy. No. The more they have, the less they're happy; because they do not know how to save the bliss to enjoy it in one time. They just spend it here and there -- one penny here, one penny there; and they have nothing left. If they saved their money, they could buy an airplane ticket, go somewhere, have a holiday, see something different, and learn and enjoy the whole relaxed two weeks, three weeks together, with their friends or alone, something like that. But everyday they spend, spend, spend. They have nothing left and they can not do anything. They can not buy a house, they cannot do anything at all. The capital is the same, but they spend it in a different way. So they never can enjoy the happiness of the concentrated love and pleasure. If you truly want to enjoy, say the pleasure gift of sex, then you must be very abstinent. You must respect abstinence, then you can enjoy better.
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Be A Faithful Partner