Before I met Master, I used to visit mediums that could see my spirit guides. One day when I went for a reflexology treatment, the lady started to open and close her eyes very fast. She was talking to my guides and told me that I was surrounded by a number of spirit beings and one was a being of unbelievable beauty. I could see she was amazed by "seeing" my guide and found it difficult to express the beauty of this presence. I asked her the name of this guide, and she replied, "She gives me the name Running Water; and when you are sad and lonely, sit by the stream and cry, and are by yourself, She is always there with you."

I was amazed at what she was saying because I often used to go to a nearby forest, rest by a stream, and contemplate. After hearing this, I had tears in my eyes and was deeply moved. However, I went on my journey, determined to find some answers, but also very confused. I knew that there was always someone guiding me, but at times, I still felt so alone. I was very emotional and used to cry a lot, sometimes so deeply like a powerful thunderstorm.

Then one day I was invited to attend one of Supreme Master Ching Hai's video lecture seminars presented by a Quan Yin messenger and fellow initiates. At that time, I was a reflexologist and one of the initiates had seen my advertisement and invited me to this talk. When I saw Master on the video, I felt this beautiful, unconditional love moving through Her. I thought She was just like Jesus, because He, too, was called the Supreme Master. I wondered if She was Jesus reincarnated. I now know that it is not the person that reincarnates, but it is the Supreme Master that returns to awaken us to our hidden Supreme Inner Truth.

However, I was greatly reluctant and troubled by inner struggles. Although I felt a love that was so pure and unconditional, I still had my doubts. In addition, I did not want to give up the delicious cheesecake with eggs in it. At that time, I would rather have cheesecake than enlightenment - how foolish one can be and how wasteful of precious time! I almost missed a once in a lifetime opportunity to meet a real living Master and to receive initiation. At that video showing, I did not apply for initiation, but tried to follow the precepts as much as I could to help my spiritual progress.

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By brother initiate Wayne Martin Cape Town, South Africa (Originally in English)