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How To Be Beautiful

Spoken by Supreme Master Ching Hai,
Hsihu Center, Formosa
November 12, 1995
(Originally in Chinese)

Our beauty comes from inside. Of course the outside should be neat too, but just looking reasonably good is enough in this aspect! I have promised to teach you how to be a good wife, how to make-up and dress up beautifully in five minutes so you can go out immediately, even to a dinner party. But then I thought again, where should we begin to beautify ourselves? Beauty is not just your face. Most important is the warm feeling between a husband and a wife, the atmosphere of understanding each other, helping each other, and protecting each other.

The outside beautiful appearance looks good at first sight, but it will not look good after you look at it for a long time. In cases of illness or accidents, the outside beautiful appearance disappears in a short time. Having only a beautiful appearance but no joy and warmth inside, both husbands and wives cannot bear that after looking at each other for a long time. For instance, some have a half-dead appearance or a face that looks like a kind of reincarnated Buddha -- a bitter-melon-face Quan Yin Bodhisattva, etc... (Audience laughs.) These people must reflect upon themselves.

Dressing beautifully does not mean wearing expensive clothes, but putting on a smiling face and having a welcoming atmosphere. These are the most beautiful 'garments.' Try putting them on! (Audience applauds.)

The outside appearance is not very important. Sometimes we think we are not pretty, but be gentle and cordial - always smile when seeing your husband. When the husband is angry, you just smile saying, "What displeased you? Please tell me!" and comfort him, hug him. He then will be pacified. But if you both get angry, even God cannot do anything good!

Likewise, when a wife is angry, her husband should comfort her with a smile, hug her, and ask her what's wrong. Talk soothingly, then she will calm down. Being a good wife does not only depend on your face. Originally, I was going to teach you how to dress nicely and how to please your husbands. Now I'll forget about that. Not knowing where to start, it is very hard to teach sometimes.

A beautiful appearance will come naturally. Just meditate more and react according to your family situation; don't just depend on your face. But the face is also important, it is part of the criteria of being a good wife. Every morning, your face is the first thing your husband sees when he wakes up. If your face is terrible, he will have bad day-dreams all day in his office (Audience laughs.) Coming home in the evening, the last face he sees is also yours. If you again give him a long face, he will have even more nightmares all night. We spiritual practitioners should have merciful hearts. (Audience laughs and applauds.)